Joseph Rubano’s This Crazy Love Life is as much a journal as it is a book of poems: each poem, a cherished moment and, together, the diary of a passionate journey aiming to embrace every gift and crucible that life anoints us with.
These poems are about relationship and the many forms that love takes. It is about the poetry of being a friend, a lover, a husband, father, grandfather, son and brother. Rubano reminds us that our simple and ordinary life is rich in relationships. He invites and inspires us to notice the little moments like his grandson riding a stick pony or calling him to dinner, the way children play and cry, the preciousness of taking a walk with an aging father or getting or not getting a letter from a friend.
Here you will find poems about watching a friend skin a deer, accompanying a friend dealing with cancer, the beauty and complexity of being married a long time, being created friend by friend. “Come!” his words invite us wordlessly, “Come and taste what I have found!”
We are offering another opportunity to sit alone among the rocks and bushes of Madre Grande. We call this experience the Desert Solo Experience (DSE).
The next DSE will be May 25-29, 2025— It is usually quite beautiful out there at Madre Grande Monastery at this time of year, especially if there has been rain during the winter. The days are not too hot and the nights not too cold. Usually quite comfortable. Unless, of course, Mother Nature decides to surprise us, which she does regularly these days.
Being alone with oneself and with the natural world. People have known the value of this kind of experience for hundreds of years. And now, when the beings of the Earth and the Being of the Earth herself is endangered, it is more and more important that we make an intimate connection to the sacredness of the natural world; that we connect to the Quiet and our Inmost Being in this way.
If something in you has been asking for this and it seems like the right time to do such a thing, give me a call or send me an email.
Here is what one woman said after sitting for 3 days:
“What lingers still is this; beyond the stress, noise and busyness of life, there is a stillness deep inside of me that has become my touchstone. I’m not saying that I’m not still affected by the challenges of everyday life, but now there is a peaceful presence I didn’t have access to prior to my Desert Solo Experiences. Now I know this stillness…this presence is my essential nature.
It is always within me…and it is accessible.” (Heather)
And another:
“The desert solo is a feast for the senses. It will broaden your perspective, soften your edges, and make you melt in the horizon of love.”
Thank you for facilitating these wonderous experiences Joseph. — (Marie, Sept. 2023)
And this:
” I have done every event you can imagine — Tony Robbins, Wake-up Warrior, all kinds of personal development, Dale Carnegie, read tons of books on stuff like this and nothing has been more impactful than the self revelation I’ve had this past 3 days! — Realizing how important things are that I wasn’t aware of, I wasn’t even present to realize what I was missing out on. Getting up on this hill and to be able to realize the importance of my life and the importance of the people who love me and care for me has been mind-blowing.” (Mike)
I am not sure it matters where you sit, except that you do choose to sit somewhere, and that place becomes your place, and your experience is intimately connected to place. Any place can become home, can become the cradling place that gives birth to something new in you, that gives birth to you… What matters is placing yourself in the hands of emptiness; the emptiness of not eating, the emptiness of nothing to have to do, the cradling hands of rest. What matters is being released from the small hands of time and living in the slow movements of the sun, moon and stars being freed from our straight-line world, the habitual boxes we live and move around in and roam for a while in the open spaces and mysterious forms of nature, in the inner dream landscapes of our being and the undefined territory of prayer. Here the secret passageway opens and everything becomes a sign, a teacher –
(from a poem by Joseph Rubano)
During the Solo you agree to take away most of the things you habitually reach for when you are in any way inwardly uneasy — the phone, the computer, a book, food, drink, a friend.
Here you are invited, almost forced, to be with yourself, with your mind, your thoughts and feelings. To meet and not avoid or turn away.
You are not totally alone — you can reach for, open to, the sky, the stars, the birds, the bushes, the rocks, your breath. Open to the silence, stillness that is always available to you underneath the noise of the mind. Let go, Let be, Let in. Take a drink of the simple clear water by your side and open.
Cost: For 3 days: $480 donation. Donations cover preparatory and follow up meetings as well as the actual 5-6 day process (including meals) and fees to Madre Grande for camping and wood. If money is an issue, talk to me, we will make it work. If money is plentiful and your experience is rich, you are welcome to donate more! $80 deposit required to hold a space.Interested?? — I can be reached at 760-576-7573 or josrubano@hotmail.com. I hope to meet you soon.
True Heart/True Mind Enlightenment Intensive Retreat in San Diego Area (April 24-28, 2025)
The Intensive will be held in the high desert at the beautiful Manzanita Village Retreat Center in Warner Springs, CA. 92086
Offered by: Joseph Rubano with Kate Feeley, Kamakshi and Christy as his trusty and indispensable monitors, with Monica in the kitchen. Since 1985 I have been involved in over 60 Intensives and have mastered 30 in the last 15 years.
Where else do people meet like this — directly, simply, whispering secrets, looking behind the mask, willing to come out of hiding, willing to see and be seen, to be fully and completely who and how you are? Who are you really? What are you anyway?
In this wild time that we live in, where the ground beneath us is always shifting, by meeting like this we are creating a new ground in the field of our hearts.
Come be part of this ever new, never finished, ground-making work.
The True Heart True Mind Enlightenment Intensive Retreat — is a modern day Initiation process; intended to awaken in the participant an unobstructed view into the way things are; to somehow come to sense/know, beyond our common way of thinking and perceiving, the vast field of awareness and love that is our home and true nature. In this Initiation, the Mystery Center is not a building or a place; it is continually being created within the space of meeting, by the very substance of meeting of one human being with another. It is a journey of self-discovery that a group of people goes on together. Tell me Who you are.Tell me What you are.
Cost: Sliding Scale — $675 – $925** Includes meals (delicious vegetarian), lodging, Monday morning integration and tuition. Non-refundable $200 deposit required to hold a space. Space is limited. Register early.
Contact: Joseph Rubano at 760-576-7573, josrubano@hotmail.com Go to www.josephrubano.com to read more about the Enlightenment Intensive **If money is not an issue, pay the higher amount; it really helps. If money is an issue, talk to me, we can work something out. Payment plan available.
So what’s wrong with fooling myself? I believe in light Inner light A smile Belief is a feeling I believe I Be Alive In Light Doesn’t all mental chatter Angst Negativity Dissolve in the Light? In a smile? For an instant? Isn’t that enough? Am I fooling myself? This self ‘My’ Tell me what that is? Am I a fool to believe in ‘my’? What kind of fool believes in ‘my self’? Take it away for a moment. Imagine no ‘myself’ Imagine starlight that belongs to no one.
Light. There is light outside my window Sun light shines on palm leaves On telephone wires Off of windows, the chrome on cars And from puddles in the street after yesterday’s rain The Light after the storm Always it is the Light that shines After any storm. The light.
There is a Self you can find by going inside. But don’t go only there. Go to the edges, stretch it thin like the skin of a drum. Give up making only dull thuds Give yourself up to singing. Go to the edges thin like the strings of a lute where whatever you know begins to vibrate begins to dissolve into laughter — crazy and bizarre, mindless laughter begins to dissolve into fears and tears at the edges there is a wild witch waiting to be released waiting to twist the crooked finger of your being into shape. There is a lover who yearns to burn to the edge where the sweet juices rise and eyes blossom into light. To the edges where the unknown world of the other waits to greet you and welcome you home. Don’t worry if there is no tea and cookies. Don’t worry if there is tea and cookies. Go to the edges where a dessert you never imagined is longing for your tongue.
It is all make believe My unhappiness I mean Probably yours too The one making me unhappy does not exist — not the way I think There is no body who doesn’t want to help No one taking pieces of dried bread or stealing oranges from small trees No one feeling the pain of loss or the upset of not having That inner gripping, clutching That soul disturbance — Self-inflicted There is no Other doing anything to you. Just sit there Feel it all Do not move Do not move In that unmoving, listen, breathe, feel You will want to move — don’t You will start to move — stop Breathe, listen, feel A gripping A letting go Gripping Letting go A hint of a tear A hint of a smile Notice the revealing True In the gaps The split seconds of falling away
Who is my mother,
Who my father,
When I am being created
friend by friend?
I don’t remember who I was without you.
We have been tending sacred fires
for a long time
We are wanderers, drawn by the light
of those fires.
Surrounded by darkness,
Emerging out of darkness,
We enter into the sacred ceremony
of each other’s life.
We sing, we dance,
Humbled by the power
Of each other’s presence
we pray.
We become prayers for each other.
We sing praises to each other.
And breath by breath, thought by thought,
touch by touch,
Music rises between us.
What I was, I am no longer.
Shaking with hope, yielding to your hands
I stand trembling before you.
